Imagine this, okay so it’s 1994 at a United Nations conference where one super cool, educated and broad-minded Surgeon General Jocelyn Elders is answering questions.
When asked about teens and masturbation, she replied: “I think that is something that is a part of human sexuality and it’s a part of something that perhaps should be taught.”
Jocelyn was asked to resign just months later.
Today most would think that is almost a normal thing to say, but still decades later we’re still shaking off the stigma around masturbation – due in large part to visionaries like Jocelyn, a crew of sex educators, and sex toy retailers past and present. (I highly recommend sexotic for all your masturbation needs)
Not only do we now know that masturbation is not only fun, it’s beneficial for you and your health as well!
Look at this!
- If you’re a penis owner, masturbation may lower your prostate cancer risk.
- Masturbation tones your pelvic floor muscles, which helps penis-owners with erectile dysfunction, and…
- Vulva owners with incontinence (super common after having a baby).
- Masturbation boosts your immunity.
- It can help you fall asleep faster.
- It can even boost your mood, due to the chemical cocktail of endorphins/oxytocin/serotonin.
So as you can see there are many benefits with very little downsides.
So if you are still on the fence about masturbation and why you should do it? Do you need some more encouragement? Don’t worry I got you!
Keep reading and learn 6 solo sex hacks that will help you masturbate well… and I mean really really well.
Mix It Up
If your current masturbation is a little rote (“watch porn, hand down pants, stroke/vibe, orgasm”), here are several ways you can tweak the formula for bigger, better orgasms:
Try a Toy that Moves with Your Body
Vulva owners: do you want to explore yourself with different vibrations that match your movements? Try a soft vibrator that conforms to the palm of your hand and is designed to move with you without losing any intensity.
Now what I’m about to say next might scare some of you, and that is okay! But it’s also okay to be interested in trying new things!
Try anal toys
Now all you penis owners first of all, have you tried sex toys at all? Because it’s 2022 baby. The sex toy industry is ready for you! (Especially sexotic 😉) They have it all! vibrating cock rings, strokers, sleeves etc., there are a million ways to stimulate your penis, with vibes that access deeper, more internal nerve endings – the ones your hand can’t stimulate on its own.
Let’s get back to the point, now is a great time to check out prostate massagers: just like the G-Spot in vagina owners, the prostate is a deep, internal gland for penis-owners that can be accessed through the anus. And if you’ve never had an anal orgasm before…believe me, you haven’t lived.
Have you ever heard of edging? Well that brings us to #3 of the list!
Edging is where you bring yourself to that point where you are making that “O” face and then you back off, cooling yourself down and then stimulating yourself right back up! The result? More blood engorging your genitals, more intense orgasms.
And now #4 on the list,
Try using your non dominant hand
Even something as simple as using your non-dominant hand can be enough to tickle your neural pathways, and make your masturbation routine more fresh. Give it a shot – and see if it doesn’t make solo sex a little more novel, a little more surprising.
Create a Juicy Fantasy
Sometimes, taking our masturbation from “ugh”to “OMG” is as easy as having the right story inside our heads.
Below you’ll find some suggestions, pick 2-3 to try out during you next solo session.
- Being slightly submissive
- Passionate oral sex, full attention
- The last hot experience I had
- Group sex
- Varies, but often shower sex
- My crush who barely knows I exist
- My boyfriend having sex with someone else
- Giving head
- Girl on girl
- Being with an enthusiastic partner
- Getting it from behind while looking in a big mirror
Inspiring right? Try them out, and if none fit your fancy, I’m sure in time you’ll find a fantasy that does!
Try Mindful Masturbation
On the flip side of fantasy, we’ve got mindful masturbation: an embodiment practice where the whole goal is tuning into your physical sensations, and exploring your body without chasing an orgasm. To try it…
- Get yourself into a meditative state with a few minutes of deep breathing: big breaths, where you exhale longer than you inhale. What we’re going here is toning the vagus nerve, which effectively turns off your fight or flight response.
- You can also engage your senses with external touches: lighting a candle, experimenting with ice or body-safe candle wax, listening to your favorite sexy music.
- As you touch yourself, resist going right for the genitals, and tease other erogenous zones instead. Ask questions along the way: “how does it feel when I stroke my labia?” “How does it feel when I stimulate my testes?” By taking the scenic route in solo sex, you’re waking up more neural pathways to pleasure.
- As you wrap up the experience, you can try one more thing: #MEDITATEMASTURBATEMANIFEST. Envision your larger goals, and align the peak of your pleasure with those intentions.
So here’s where we end off, and I challenge you to try at least one of these tips and tricks to achieving a great solo sex life, whether it’s edging, test-driving a new fantasy, mindful masturbation or anything else you’ve seen on this list. Seize the day (and possibly a sex toy from sexotic), and enjoy getting to know yourself in a super hot way.